The quiet emotional stages of settling into Cuenca

By Jim Smith

Arriving in Cuenca often feels like a fresh start filled with color, mountain air, and possibility. Many people come here to slow down, to breathe, or to begin again. What is not talked about as often is the emotional shifting that happens after the excitement settles. Even in a beautiful place, the heart can feel uncertain for a while. That quiet uncertainty is something many expats share but rarely name.

The Honeymoon Stage
At first, everything feels new and alive. The markets feel vibrant. The coffee tastes better. The streets feel full of promise. Daily inconveniences feel small compared to the excitement of being somewhere different. This stage can last weeks or even months. It is natural to feel energized here. Nothing is wrong with enjoying it fully.

The Frustration Stage
Then everyday life begins to take over. Language barriers feel heavier. Simple errands take longer. Misunderstandings happen. The systems feel unfamiliar. This is often when doubt enters quietly. Some begin to wonder if they made the right choice. Others feel tired without knowing why. This stage surprises many people because it comes after so much hope.

The Adjustment Stage
Slowly, small things begin to shift. You learn where to shop. You find your favorite walking routes. You stop translating every moment in your head. You begin to recognize faces. Life does not feel easy yet, but it feels more manageable. Progress is gradual and often invisible to anyone but you.

The Acceptance Stage
This is when Cuenca often becomes less of a destination and more of a place you live. The city no longer needs to impress you. You stop expecting it to be perfect. You accept both the beauty and the challenges. Familiarity replaces fantasy. For many, this is when a quiet sense of belonging begins to grow.

Why Expectations Matter
In last week’s reflection on expectations, we explored what we bring with us when we move here and what we slowly learn to release. These emotional stages are connected to that process. When expectations soften, these stages become easier to live through instead of fight against.

For readers who want to explore this inner transition more deeply, this global reflection on the emotional stages of starting over in a new country may also be helpful: The Emotional Stages of Starting Over in a New Country

There Is No Timeline
Some people move through these stages quickly. Others take years. Some move back and forth between them. All of it is normal. None of it means you failed. It simply means you are human and adjusting to a new life in a new place.

If you are somewhere in the middle of this emotional journey right now, you are not alone. Many around you are walking the same quiet path.