Editor’s note: The Latin American media are taking perverse delight in the prospect that Russian espionage may have played a role in last month’s election of Donald Trump as president of the U.S. For decades, U.S. resources were used to install right-wing puppet presidents in Latin America. Versions of the following satire have appeared in the press and on websites throughout Latin America.
By Quentin D Fortesqueue
Thousands of people are feared dead in Central and Latin America this week after literally laughing their heads off at the news that the CIA is complaining that Russia may have rigged the US election and installed a right wing puppet dictator.
With global irony reserves critically low this comes as yet another blow to the global satire industry.
We approached Manuel Noriega, the former CIA stooge, intelligence asset, gun runner and cocaine smuggler who mysteriously became the President of Panama in 1983, and asked him what he thought of the allegations. He said from his prison cell;
“Ahahahahahahaha. Haaaaaaaaa haaaaaaa haaaaaaaaa!”
Unable to get any sense from Señor Noriega we went to Chile where the CIA installed General Pinochet in 1973. We asked the wife of Eugenio Berrios, the biochemist who invented black cocaine, who was assassinated by Pinochet to cover up the use of Sarin Gas and anthrax against political opponents, what she thought of the rumors.
“Good one. Haaaaaa hahaha. Honestly don’t. Hoo hoo hoo. I can’t breathe. Seriously get help. Hahahahaha. It’s too funny. Haaaa.”
We were unable to get any sense from anybody in Iraq, the Congo, Venezuela, Brazil or the Philippines as they were laughing too busy laughing themselves stupid.
Credit: The Rochdale Herald, http://rochdaleherald.co.uk